Your email address will not be published. He had lost two fingers in a knife fight on the set of the movie "Scarface." She was last seen in long, dark leggings, a teal hooded sweatshirt and slip-on Vans in a dark green and black print. The memoir Half in Love: Surviving the Legacy of Suicide captures very well, to a painful degree, how someone who deeply loves their children can simultaneously feel pulled to end her life. My family lied to me about basically everything relevant and valuable in life. Key to my recovery was becoming realistic about my part in creating the calamity called my life, but also needed to recognize others responsibilities as well. Challenges, extreme challenges. Thats why I searched for answers and I found this site. She failed at killing herself and learned a different process of questions to see her feelings. The. I wanted to talk with others in the same situation but I could understand how that may not be in the best interest of either party. Someone may have seen something -- any piece of information could help lead us to Sydney," parents Kimberly and Jay West said in a joint statement. But I have. Has left me pretty much bankrupt and not willing to live. Now I wonder whether I also pressed reset on my brain. Golden Gate Bridge, suspension bridge spanning the Golden Gate in California to link San Francisco with Marin county to the north. More women attempt suicide but more men complete it because men use more lethal methods. Sydney West was last seen near the Golden Gate Bridge in the early morning hours of Sept. 30, walking near Crissy Field. Also Live Through This website has beautiful portraits (photographic but also in prose) of people who survived a suicide attempt. She was last seen in the area around 6:45 a.m. It was apparently very foggy that morning. Ive been hospitalized 4 times in the past 6 weeks, after my 9th suicide attempt. West had just gone off to college to her dream school, University of California Berkeley. Your comments are false. Thanks for sharing your story here. Rhodes press agent, Susan Todd, told reporters that Dusty had painstakingly calculated the speed of his fall, how he would hit the water and other details, as he did when he prepared for his movie stunts. Interviews with jump survivors and potential jumpers . My overdose gave me seizures. I mean how long can I go ahead. She was last seen September 30, 2020, from the San Francisco area near the Golden Gate Bridge specifically around Crissy field. Dr. Freedenthal also is an associate professor at the University of Denver Graduate School of Social Work, and a psychotherapist and consultant in private practice. I cant get beyond the pain. Previously, police said she had not been seen or heard from since before dawn, on Sept. 29. 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They would split the profits from the film 50/50. [This comment was edited to abide by the Comments Policy. Precious few people survive such a fall; the water about 200 feet below acts the same as concrete when a person lands on it at high speed. I am sure your mum will be watching over you, so sad that she caused you so much pain, please seek help, you are precious, with love xxx. I wonder what psychotherapy he has tried. We remain hopeful that someone knows something that will be helpful in finding her.. Your battle won matters. In February 2009, following the murder of a four-year-old girl who was thrown off the bridge by her father, the first stage of a temporary suicide barrier was erected on Westgate Bridge, constructed of concrete crash barriers topped with a welded mesh fence. The Golden Gate Bridge is the number one suicide site in the world. Her disappearance was every parents worst nightmare. Too, people who attempt suicide may receive the help they need afterwards. Missing person: The San Francisco Police Department is asking the public to report any information regarding 19-year-old Sydney West who was last seen on Sept. 30, 2020, at SF's Crissy Field. I did find this website and it has so much information that I needed to read. I know you mean well, but I always feel I wished I never survived. The night before she disappeared (Sept. 29) she and her father Jay West had a lengthy phone conversation according to her family. As I entered Oklahoa, something I like to think it was my Higher Powerinspired me to call my brother in Illinois and I ended up going in and out of treatment centers until I finally realized that Im an alcoholic and that there was hope for me. You can learn more about me here. I woke up on my own after my first attempt. And half of people who die by suicide had attempted suicide at least once previously. Life really sucked and so did I. I blamed myself for everything that was wrong and then some. Lets get real here life sucks and its hard but dont give up. It amazes me that the vast majority of suicides are by men, and virtually all of the articles about it are by women. 10 Reasons Teens Avoid Telling Parents about Suicidal Thoughts. BERKELEY, CA The parents of Sydney "Syd" West, a missing person who was previously a University of California, Berkeley student, have divulged new details in her case and are asking anyone with information to come forward. Precious few people survive such a fall; the water about 200 feet below acts the same as concrete when a person lands on it at high speed. There are so many types of antidepressants these days (around 40), plus mood stabilizers, plus antipsychotic medications that can also be used to treat depression. I know that this surprises many people. That changes things. Rhodes also made the news in 1946 on a radio program called Truth or Consequences in which he was bizarrely tasked with living on a traffic island on the corner of Hollywood Boulevard and La Brea for three weeks. I agree with you completely, Anonymous. I just read your post. "Syd," as she liked to be called, was initially thought to have last been seen or heard from early the morning of September 30 in the Crissy Field area. I was so worried about him, but he refused to get help and he kept drinking. He now works daily, and diligently, to manage continued symptoms that can include depression and hearing voices. Sydney West is from Chapel Hill, North Carolina, but also grew up in the Pleasanton area. A good place to start is the Facebook group Live Through This. Wishing you peace, I am both, not realizing this until reading today My dad ended his life by his own hands , when I was 9. The Golden Gate Bridge came to be recognized as a symbol of the power and progress of the United States, and it set a precedent for suspension-bridge design around the world. Any information could help so if you know anyone that was in that area around that time, please use contact information provided below. I recently lost a good friend to suicide. Search within r/redsox. "This will be the biggest jump of my life," he told her. Sydney West's parents confirmed she was last seen on the Golden Gate Bridge. After all, they were intent on dying. Getting through them is the way to make your life your own again.. Had she jumped somebody definitely would have noticed, and it would've been caught on CCTV (the cameras are placed on light poles so fog does not block). Come home.. Good luck to you, Joan. But the other day I told him that and now hes moving in with me again so my life is going good again! For those who are thinking about suicide, I know what happens after youre gone isnt part of the thought process, but believe me, you might end your pain, but the trajectory of pain caused to others is also insurmountable. Her family launched a website,findsydneywest.com, that they hope will remind the community Sydney is still missing. It may help,, Kind Regards, and the evidence around them is not good. The chances of surviving are less than 1.5%, and almost zero if the feet don't hit first. What happens to them afterward? I am so very grateful now to be alive and I hope to find ways to assist others going through the deep abyss that can sometimes take over your entire being take another breath, and another. Dec. 11, 2019 Updated: Dec. 12, 2019 8:06 a.m. 5. That's a mind-blowing statement. Im here. This site continues to distract me from my suicidal thoughts. Generally, research into method substitution has found that blocking access to a suicide method results in fewer suicides overall, even when taking into consideration those suicides by people who found other ways to die. We will never recover from it. And the children are adults now. Everything says Get help. Additionally, Hines takes medication and . She grew up in Pleasanton, CA and then moved to Chapel Hill, NC with her family during high school. Sydney Kaitlyn West, 19, was last seen near the Golden Gate Bridge around 6:45 a.m. on September 30, 2020. He struck the water with his face. This is certainly true for me: narcissistic mother and sister. 2021 CBS Broadcasting Inc. All Rights Reserved. As 6 months passes where we have not seen or heard fromSydney, it becomes increasingly painful, her parents, Jay and Kimberly West, said in a statement provided to SFGATE. Be blunt and honest dont sugar coat how you feel. Andrew Chamings is an editor at SFGATE. In 2000, he actually did jump off the Golden Gate Bridge. Had medical intervention on the second. And there ended Rhodes four-years-in-the-making attempt to wow crowds and find fame by jumping from the bridge into the bay. T he Golden Gate Bridge is one of the top suicide sites in the world, surpassed only by the Yangtze River Bridge in Nanjing, China.People have jumped off of the bridge for nearly as long as it's been accessible to the public; the first recorded suicide a World War I veteran suspected to have suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder took place less than three months after the . I hope he is seeing a psychiatrist for his medications, not a PCP, because psychiatrists are much more well versed in the benefits, risks, side effects, etc. I knew then that I would never try it again. I am resigned to staying alive until I die in some other way. 18 I held a gun to my head in my backyard w my finger on the trigger. My advice to you or to those considering suicide or attempted suicide, please THINK of your loved one, your family and friends. Anyone interested in following the investigation may do so on Facebook or Instagram, and tag posts with #FindSydneyWest. The decision collapsed Rhodes sister's claim that her brother was murdered as cameraman Guzman should have been in a boat to pull her brother out of the water. But in reality, he cant know what the future holds. I was driving toward the Hoover Dam bypass bridge from Memphis over 4 years ago to jump off. I am a survivor as well of rape and spousal abuse, Am feeling empowered today, thanks to you. r/redsox. Ken Baldwin. Im sorry to hear of your loss West, 20, grew up in Pleasanton, Calif. She was a star volleyball player at Foothill High School and loved singing at open mic nights. That is no way to live, but that is the reality. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Its always women telling men what we should be. What happens is if you dont kill yourself you spend the rest of your life being told you didnt mean it. Copyright 2023 Nexstar Media Inc. All rights reserved. The Golden Gate Bridge crosses the Golden Gate Strait and connects the City of San Francisco and the County of Marin to the north. After my attempt at suicide, I tried to find information about my feelings and what others were feeling. Tears ago, when my children were younger, I actually reached a point where I went beyond imagining the trauma and lifelong suffering, to my children; such was my pain. God will come through for you but you have to make an attempt. Dressed in a blue sweatshirt, leggings and Vans slip-on sneakers, the 19-year-old college student last contacted her family the day before with a lengthy phone call to her dad, Jay West. Rhodes had been seeking fame all his life, and successfully became one of Hollywoods first stuntmen, appearing in movies such as "Under Arizona Skies" and "Duel in the Sun," in which he performed a cliff jump. The longitude and latitude for the Bridge location is approximately: N 37 Degrees, 49 Minutes, 8.0 Seconds --- W 122 Degrees, 28 Minutes, 40.6 Seconds. A view of the Golden Gate Bridge with San Francisco behind it in January 1947. In this clinical case conference, the authors begin by presenting vignettes to capture the diversity of bridge suicide. Sydney West never returned home, and has not been heard from since. I cant tell you how much of what you write touches me in some way. You also can find other places to get help by phone, email, chat, or text at http://www.SpeakingOfSuicide.com/resources/#immediatehelp. Lately, the suicidal thoughts have permeated my brain. If all else fails do something drastic. Good luck to your friend, Julie, and thanks for commenting. I warned her of the possible dangers of the physical response to discontinuance, not thinking of her emotional well being. Its sad how much youve suffered, and its inspirational how differently you feel right now. I once attributed that simply to having realized I wanted to live and (narrowly) surving my attempt. Andrew was formerly a Creative Executive at Westbrook Studios. If you want to talk with someone immediately by phone, text, or chat, please check out the Resources page. Take a trip somewhere I mean what do you have to lose, on your journey to wherever you may see life worth living make yourself do something. All 29 people who survived their suicide attempts off San Francisco's Golden Gate Bridge have said they regretted their decision as soon as they jumped. Also, I've authored the books Helping the Suicidal Person: Tips and Techniques for Professionals and Loving Someone with Suicidal Thoughts: What Family, Friends, and Partners Can Say and Do. I meant it, and I almost succeeded. The San Francisco Police Department's tip line can be reached at 415-575-4444. I hate when people invalidate another persons pain by suggesting a suicide attempt wasnt a sincere result of suffering. To request removal of your name from an arrest report, submit these required items to arrestreports@patch.com. This is perhaps why only one of Rhodes' three small parachutes opened, doing nothing to slow him down. Your email address will not be published. There are many people with children whose pain or distorted thinking overrides all else, in spite of their best wishes. He and his wife lived in Tracy and had an adorable . As well, though, I believe I may have accidentally given myself something like ECT. Comments RSS Feed, My name is Denis and I live in England I am still recovering at the moment on 22nd of April 2020 I attempted to end my life I jumped off a 5 story carpark and survived I broke my left leg in 3 places and my right ankle in 6 places and my back in 2 places but I am lucky because I am recovering well and I can walk .people say its a mircle but I feel gulty because no one knew about the thoughts I was having for years because I did not tell any one to the outside world I was the life and soul of the party .I feel ashamed that now every one is worried about me and that is not what I wanted. January 25, 2021 / 11:03 AM At this point I feel like Ill just maim myself or end up locked up for a minimum of six months( yes thats happened to me). Anyone with information about Sydneys whereabouts is asked to contact private investigator Scott Dudek by texting or calling 925-705-8328. I couldnt pull all the way. Healthcare sucks, Government sucks, Law Enforcement Sucks, the economy sucks, the housing market, job, market, and prospects suck, no body likes me, including myself, and I really dont like anyone else either. I often want to jump off the bridge by my apartment. Footage in the area, according to a website the family recently set up in light of her disappearance, was blocked by fog and morning haze. I also knew that there was no hope whatsoever for what was wrong with me. Simply put, means restriction saves lives. She is 5 10 tall and weighs 130 pounds. YEAH? You provide inspiration to others who still are stuck in that hopelessness and despair. But what about people like me? You can find a life worth living, too, if you set your mind to finding solutions. West was born in Walnut Creek and lived briefly in Castro Valley before her family moved to Pleasanton. In 2013, 118 potential jumpers were talked down from their attempts and did not jump. He says he fully expected to speak with her the next day and became very worried when she didnt return multiple calls from him. Obviously, the will to live does not reassert itself in everyone who has tried to die. PLEASANTON, Calif. (KRON) Nearly a year has gone by since a Bay Area college student, Sydney West, vanished in San Francisco. Sydneyhas not used her phone, social media or bank accounts since she disappeared. Has he tried cognitive behavior therapy? At the age of 19, Kevin Hines attempted to commit suicide by jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge, an all-too-common act that nearly always results in death. Photos purchased from Fotolia.com. Here I thought I just occasionally drank too much. Sydney Harbour Bridge has a suicide prevention barrier. West was last seen on the Golden Gate Bridge onSept. 30, 2020 just before 7 a.m., according to the San Francisco Police Department. And for most of those whose lives were saved, life goes on for many more years to come. Afterward, I was disgusted and angry. I fantasize a lot about suicide. But the cameras lost sight of her because of heavy fog, making it impossible to know what happened toher. A narcissistic parent doesnt cause suicide, either lifes problems do or mental illness does. Maybe I didnt want to think he could actually do it. But then they are stopped from jumping. Dont believe anyone who tells you differently. She struggled with being so far away from her parents and sister, who reside in North Carolina. . "On Aug. 20, 1985, I jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge, and I survived." Ken Baldwin was 28 years old and had just started a family. I saw the signs, the depression, his feelings of hopelessness, but somehow its easier to see the signs after it happens and not while you are in the throes of this emotional rollercoaster. But what if you dont want help? Say someone wants to die by suicideso badly that they go to the Golden Gate Bridge to jump off. Any suggestions? I supported her desire to stop taking her medication. The entire bridge in covered with CCTV cameras monitored 24/7, and footage is retained for 6 months as it is federal land and monitored by Homeland Security. My husband killed himself 6 weeks ago at home to put a closure on our marital problem. But things went wrong for Dusty as he climbed the rails to attempt the feat. Her family relocated to North Carolina in July 2017. West, 19, disappeared on a foggy San Francisco morning, around 6:45 a.m. to 7 a.m. Wednesday, Sept. 30 on the Golden Gate Bridge. Theres people who love you and want you to keep pushing even if your soul reason is living to not put them through that heartache. We dont like living in pain, and we look for ways of ending that pain and, being creatures of habit, we do it in old familiar ways because thats what we know. I think it could be helpful to you. Michael Horan at 415-553-1028 or the family's private investigator at 925-705-8328. But 10 years later, Im there again. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed. She was said to be very close with her family. I put up a front so my kids wont end up the same way. My reason to live is so I dont hurt people who care but what if you have no one who cares there was a time I had no one it was only my stupidity that got the hospital aware of my attempt. I tried to commit suicide when I was 18. About his dads suicide, your article helping me a lot to help. Wests parents confirmed in a new video released late Thursday she was last seen shortly before 7 a.m. on the Golden Gate Bridge. Im sorry to hear about all the pain youve been through. You note that installation of a suicide barrier at the Bloor Viaduct in Toronto merely caused people to go to other locations in Toronto to die by suicide. You might think that, once freed from the authority figures who prevented their suicide on the bridge, they still went on to by suicide. She was struggling with depression for years. I hope you believe your words here, or at least are beginning to. All theses years following, I did not feel good about myself, am reunited with my nephew, reading up on how to talk to him. "Jump." That's the word Kevin Hines heard in his head on September 25, 2000, as he stood on the Golden Gate Bridge.
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